Life Gets Chaotic

I am not big on red meat. Ask anyone who knows me, its very rare occasions that I eat red meat and when I do; it’s steak. I don’t have anything against it. It’s not a religious thing or anything like that. I just always feel like I’ve ate a bucket a grease along with my food. I can feel it on my skin. I practically do not like feeling like I need a shower IMMEDIATELY after I eat.

That being said…

The most delicious thing I have ever eaten was a hamburger I got from a small shack on the side of mountain in Maui. Literal shack. There was enough room in there for her fridge and stove. It had two picnic tables sitting beside it. LOCATED IN THE MIDDLE OF A COW FIELD!! Cows were walking up to the table as we were eating. I petted several of them as they walked by. Now, I can’t tell you if it was the fact I hadn’t eaten anything all day or the adrenaline from cliff jumping; or (as the optimist likes to believe) it was simple the freshness and talent of the cook that made that burger so delicious.

This was 10 years ago. I’m not even sure if this shack is still there. We had spent all day exploring the Road to Hana. Met some really cool locals. Found this swimming hole on complete accident, we just happened to spot it as we were driving by. The Seven Sacred Pools aka Pools of  ʻOheʻo (ʻOheʻo Gulch). They are absolutely gorgeous, separate pools all interconnected with waterfalls going into the ocean. And the locals were cliff jumping into one of those pools.

After 10 minutes of watching, my wonderful can-do attitude decided I could do that too! I basically watched long enough to figure out how they were getting up to the top of the cliff and observe where they were jumping. I didn’t think, didn’t second guess. My boyfriend at the time said he would wait at the bottom take pictures. That was all it took for me to be convinced to do it.

At this point in my story, I feel it is necessary to mention I am terrified of heights. A small detail I forgot all about until I was standing on the edge and it was my turn to jump. I, also, did not take in account that I am the only white person doing this. It was mid-winter here in Ohio, so I was as white as white could get. I’m certain I was shinning when the sun hit me standing up there. So, now I am on the edge. Terrified. All eyes on me. Watching. Waiting. I look back and there was another person patiently waiting her turn.

No turning back now…….

And I jumped. Before I could over think the distance or the rocks sticking out randomly from the cliff. Before I doubted I could. I just jumped. The boyfriend refused to do it after. He said he didn’t want to get wet. We all know the truth though; he was to scared to try.

I was scared. I am always scared. What you do with that fear is what determines the type of life you have. The type of person you are. This memory has lived with me for the past decade. Every time he called me a coward. Every time he knocked me down. I think he hated that fact about me. The simple truth that if I wanted to despite being afraid I would make the jump.